USA 13 - Memphis' Vitamin "G"

Warning: Please see your doctor before you attempt to read this post - readers with high cholesterol risk major heart damage.

Last night was a first - our waiter, at Dyer's (on Beale St), told us to "sit anywhere", then came over to tell us of the 95 year old fat they use in their diner. He was so proud. So very very proud. He then explained to us that all the burgers were deep fried (their meat patty, that is) and that they don't use tomato or lettuce, only cheese - and he would highly recommend the double meat, double cheese burger.

What do you do with that???

He walked away, to get our drinks (refillable Coke pour moi and a root beer for HOS), and I saw he had the diner's t-shirt on. On the back was written: "Have you had your Vitamin G today?". Hmmmmm.

I called him back. "What is Vitamin G?".

How silly of me - Vitamin G is of course, GREASE. Yes, that's their motto - Have you had your Vitamin "Grease" today!!! Things were getting even more out of control than I could ever have imagined. Let's just retrace, the night before Chili and Tamales, that day Neely's BBQ for lunch, then a bloody deep fried hamburger for dinner...I was learning new definitions for the term "ridiculous".

In my defence, I will say that I balked a little and suggested we move on. HOS wasn't impressed. HOS, wise man that he is, leans back in his booth and says "You've got to stop eating with your brain". Profound man, my HOS. And right here, right now, was when he coined that, by now, famous phrase - "Food here doesn't make any sense at all".

We ordered a simple burger and fries combo. One patty, no cheese - plain and simple - with their fries - TO SHARE. Our waiter looked shocked at our lightweight attitude, I then had to explain about BBQ for lunch. He got it.

He came back about 10 mins later with the above. Looks innocent enough, in fact one could say it looked a little blah blah. HOS broke it in half - ensuring the ketchup and mustard was evenly distributed. We took a bite. And the noises started. It was RIDICULOUSLY GOOD. Please take a moment to breathe, we had to. We gobbled appreciatively, and our Waiter arrived with a smug grin on his face..."so how is it?" we just nodded and made noises..."it just melts in your mouth doesn't it?" he says...we just nodded and made more noises.

But of course, only half a burger and some fries does not a dinner make...and we didn't get dessert after BBQ...so...it was time for the decadent part of the day! And where better to eat dessert than in a deep fried diner (with 95 year old grease!)!

Our waiter pops back, and he asks THE question (we had previously asked about dessert - there was deep fried Twinkie and Deep Fried Suzie Q on the menu, however they were all out of Twinkies, so it was deep fried Suzie Q or zip)..."so, will there be a deep fried Suzie Q for dessert?" ...we just nodded and made more noises.

Now, just when you think you can't get any more ridiculous than what we had already consumed that day...along comes a deep fried Suzie Q. Don't feel silly, readers, if you don't know what a Suzy Q is, we didn't either, but our Waiter was most helpful in explaining that it's two layers of chocolate cake sandwiched with sugary cream. And they deep fry it. In the 95 year old grease.

I was almost hysterical by this time. Waiting. Anticipating. Fear and dread (and a little excitement).

Waiter arrives. Puts it down in front of us. I burst out laughing - I was moving into a manic episode and I hadn't even tasted it yet. There it was, and there it is above. Battered and deep fried chocolate cream cake with raspberry sauce. We poked, prodded, and finally cracked the batter...it went in soooooo smoothly...we took a spoonful each and hesitantly tasted. I burst out laughing again...it was FABULOUS. I'm laughing as I write, down in the posh lobby of the Peabody, because it was such a surreal moment. So ridiculously ridiculous (must get a thesaurus), and so deliciously delicious. We scoffed down the lot, feeling the warm yuminess spread all over (and the heart try to pound that bit harder to get the blood through the clogged arteries). Oh the pure bliss of decadence. Sublime.

Deep fried Suzie Q is quite possibly the most ridiculous thing I've ever eaten, and I'd have to say represents our visit to Memphis perfectly...laid back, wacky, and very very warm!